Ex-Friend texted me last night.

...

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

...

I'm having a little freak-out over it.

So, here's what happened.

About two or three or four months ago -- I don't remember how long; I'm horrible with sensing the passage of time -- I got a friend request on MySpace from Danny Kaye. Of course, it wasn't the actual Danny Kaye, but still, I LOVE Danny Kaye! And so I went to check out the profile for this Danny Kaye.

On the MySpace profile, there was a video of Danny Kaye and Harry Belafonte doing a little ditty on The Danny Kaye Show. It made me laugh out loud, it was so campy and playful! It just made me happy to watch it, and I had an undeniable urge to share the joy with someone.

Enter EF.

Danny Kaye is EF's favorite, from childhood. EF LOVES Danny Kaye, and introduced me to a lot of Danny Kaye stuff that I never even knew existed. It was one of the many things that the two of us shared between just us. It was loving and special, like we were part of some secret club that no one else really got.

So, it was completely natural, if a little unfortunate, that the person with whom I wanted to share the Danny Kaye video most in the world was EF.

And then, I thought about it some more, and realized, hey, what's the big deal? So you send EF a video! That doesn't mean that you have to be friends with EF! It's totally safe; there's no way EF will ever try to talk to you again, anyway. And if you use your new e-mail address, who knows? Maybe the video link will get put in EF's junk mail box instead of the inbox, and EF will never, ever, ever know you sent the dadgum thing in the first place! This is totally fine!

I sent the video to EF.

I believe my e-mail said something to the effect of, "I saw this and it made me laugh, and I just had to share it with someone. Naturally, you came to mind, and I figured, eh, what the hell."

Months passed. And then I got this text last night:

"thanks for the danny kaye video. i hope you've been well you have been in my thoughts."

My immediate reaction:

RUN FOR THE HILLS!

My actual, carefully crafted response:

"Glad u enjoyed it kid. Hope ur good too."

Calm and cool, right? Right! In my text message. I'm calm and cool. Right.

God help me.